The Director Sector

My friend William loves pirates. He loves them so much that every year he dresses up as a pirate for Halloween and hosts numerous “pirates vs ninjas” parties. He loves yelling “Arrrr, move ye scallywags!” while waving a beer in the air. I think if he could continue working as a light designer with it, he’d cut off his hand and put a hook there instead.

My friend Andrew loves ninjas. He’s loves them so much that every year he dresses up as a ninja for Halloween and attends numerous “pirates vs ninjas” parties. He wishes he could stalk around silently and assassinate those who displease him, like Katherine Turtle, or slink quietly into the room with nobody noticing. I think he’d be perfectly willing to never get laid if he could be a real ninja. Maybe he wouldn’t go that far.

Why should you care? Pirates? Ninjas? Have I been watching too many B movies?

Fortunately, no, I have not. I am, however, using Andrew and William as a metaphor.

Yep. A metaphor. Aren’t you proud?

There are two types of people on the Internet. Those who can whistle a tune and those who can’t.

There are also pirates and ninjas.

The Pirates love waving their swords in your face, expressing their opinion preceded by their favorite letter (arrr!). They have no fear of retaliation, because if you do, they’ll just march you right off the plank. They won’t hide or run. They’re notorious for one thing — the one thing they seek above all, even booty and beer — infamy. Or fame. Depends on how you look at it.

Ninjas, on the other hand, avoid the spotlight. In fact, you might say that’s their job. They hide in the shadows and strike when they can get away with it. You’ll never see a ninja attack in broad daylight with dozens of witnesses. They strike with little fear of retaliation because nobody will ever find them. It’s as if they don’t really exist.

Some people on the internet are Pirates. They don’t mind if you know who they are. They proudly announce their identities and express their opinions.

Some people on the internet are Ninjas. They DO mind if you know who they are. They hide behind a wall that prevents others from finding out who they are. They protect themselves from harm by hiding behind a pseudonym.

Each has their pros and cons. Pirates are infamous for a reason — they’re easy targets and they’re out in the open. They might make their points known and might score a bit of loot every now and again, but the common people don’t really like them that much. Ninjas on the other hand are very good at striking quickly and cleanly, waiting for the right moment to strike for the most benefit.

On the other hand, there are fingers.

Sorry. On the other hand, people dislike thugs who hide in the shadows and refuse to face the light of day for fear of getting hurt.

I like to think of myself as somewhere in the middle. I protect myself with a pseudo-secret identity, but I’m not making a huge effort to hide who I am. I refer to myself as “The Director” because that’s the way I see myself — a director. A rookie director, to be sure, but a director nonetheless. However, I do realize that a certain amount of… well, honesty, I guess… that is needed to run a blog such as this.

I firmly believe what I believe. However, I also realize that my musings here might not always be correct, and I am fully prepared to change my beliefs and thoughts when new evidence presents itself.

Therefore, as a searcher of truth, I am not afraid to hide behind a pseudonym. I will continue to go by the pseudonym — not out of fear, but out of identification.

I am neither a pirate nor a ninja.
I am The Director.